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Go Deeper With God
The kingdom
I Peter 2:9 (TPT)—“But you are God’s chosen treasure—priests who are kings, a spiritual nation set apart as God’s devoted ones. He called you out of darkness to experience His marvelous light, and now He claims you as His very own. He did this so that you would broadcast His glorious wonders throughout the world.” You and I are created by God with immense treasure within–waiting to be discovered and utilized for His Kingdom’s sake. Our lives are but one great treasure hunt. We are always searching for something—what, we know not—but we search. He is the “360 God.” We belong to Him, and He belongs to us. He puts Himself at our disposal. He communicates to us all that we are capable of receiving. Only He, His life, can complete us, validate us, and fulfill us. Human life involves capacity. Capacity craves satisfaction, and that which satisfies is a “blessing,” a gift. Our most important needs are spiritual in nature—adequate spiritual blessing. Ephesians 1:3 (TPT)—“Every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realm has already been lavished upon us as a love gift from our wonderful heavenly Father, the Father of our Lord Jesus—all because He sees us wrapped into Christ….” We are citizens of Heaven, friends of Jesus, and children of God Most High. Kingdom Treasure is available to you now. Are you available for Kingdom Treasure to be manifested through you?
One of humanity’s great challenges is being consumed by what is behind us rather than what is in front of us. You cannot expect to fully experience the future if you are preoccupied with your past. Everything concerning God’s Kingdom on Earth is the future—it is filled with power, potential, energy, and life beyond imagination. We are God’s seed, and His Kingdom seed is sown within us. He thus sows us into the world to live as Kingdom citizens. To become Kingdom producers in our world, we must continually seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness. As Kingdom citizens, we positively impact the culture around us to advance His Kingdom on Earth. In order to prosper on Earth, we must prosper in His Kingdom—storing up treasures in Heaven. We must live as Kingdom citizens, ever seeking Him. Often, we are so consumed with the kingdom of our senses (soul, body) that His Kingdom gets lost in the everyday hustle and bustle of life. In the parables of “The Hidden Treasure” and “The Pearl of Great Price,” Jesus sets them forth from the standpoint of the individual—the means by which a man becomes a citizen of His Kingdom. They both speak of the incomparable value of the Kingdom of God. Jesus said—“Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness.” Paul said—“Seek the things which are above…set your affections on things above…not on the things of the Earth.” Life is designed by God to be a search, a discovery. Many of life’s greatest treasures lie hidden. There is a supreme purpose in life. The way of wisdom, knowledge, and understanding is never the easy path. To discover the rich treasures of His Kingdom requires much time in His Presence, cultivating a relationship of intimacy.
Daniel Taylor said, “Freedom is useless if we don’t exercise it as character making choices.” We are free to change stories by which we live. Because we are genuine characters, and not mere puppets, we can choose our defining stories. We can do so because we actively participate in the creation of our stories. We are co-authors as well as characters. Few things are as encouraging as the realization that things can be different and that we have a role in making them so. Galatians 5:16 (MSG) My counsel is this: live freely, animated and motivated by God’s Spirit. Then you won’t feed the compulsions of selfishness. You are never more a man (or woman) than when you embrace an adventure beyond your control, or when you walk into a battle you aren’t sure of winning. We should see every adventure of our life as an opportunity for initiation. What are You teaching me, God? What are You asking me to do or to let go of? What in my heart are You speaking to? Originality and creativity are essential to identity and calling. The adventure begins and our real strength is released when we no longer rely on formulas. God is an immensely creative person and He wants His children to live that way too. God wants us to know that our battles are personal to Him and He will design personal and unique strategies for each battle. The theme of our story is how we become human. What does it mean to become human, be a real man, a real woman? What must we deal with in order to become ourselves, to grow up? We can’t be human without God. Human life is a great gift; every part of it is designed by God and therefore means something. Every part of it is blessed by God and therefore is to be enjoyed. We can refuse to participate in God, act as if He isn’t our designer, provider and covenant presence. But when we refuse, we’re less; our essential humanity is less, our lives are diminished and impoverished. God-thirst is the most powerful drive in us, stronger than all the drives of sex, power, security and fame put together. Against all probabilities and despite the opinions of family, friends and enemies, we are chosen, elected by God for His purposes. Once you know who you are, you acquire a God-dominated imagination. You practice the presence of God and His presence captivates your thinking about your responses to life. The most personal, most significant, most human thing we ever do is to believe in and trust in God. Is your imagination dominated by God or by fear? Are you going to live out of your God-created, spirit-anointed, God-assigned, God-defined identity or allow the world of circumstance, fear and intimidation to dictate your response to life? The place where God calls you is the place where your deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet. To be God-chosen is to be God-anointed, God-assigned and God-defined.
Unique, special, distinctive, rare, unequaled, matchless – that is how each of us can be described. Truly there is no one like each one of us – we are indeed one-of-a-kind. We just do not realize how unique each of us is. DNA molecules can unite in an infinite number of ways – the number is 10 to the 2,400,000,000th power. To put this in perspective, some scientists have guessed that all the particles in the universe are probably less than 10 with 76 zeroes behind it, far less than the possibilities of your own DNA. Why did God go to such extremes in making us so very unique? The answer is obvious – each of us is designed with our own specific works and purpose in His Kingdom which are specifically related to our purpose. Your gifts, talents, abilities are all an indication of the works He has already assigned you to do. The question we should always be asking is – what is God’s will? Once I know God’s will, then I can adjust my life to Him and his purposes. The plan He has for each of our lives is based on what He is doing in His universe. He says to each of us–adjust your life to me. God never, ever gives up on the real you He created you to be – The you He had in mind from the beginning. The you that along the way has been taunted, tainted, and tangled by tests and traumas. The you the Holy Spirit is ready to bring to fulfillment and to your highest destiny. Each person has a specific place within the overall scheme of God’s plan for the world. Character, nature, gifts and position are specifically designed to fulfill whatever task God purposed for us. When an architect designs a new building, he first asks–what is its purpose? How is it to be used? Each of us is a custom-designed, one-of-a-kind masterpiece. Ephesians 2:10 – For we are His workmanship [His own master work, a work of art], created in Christ Jesus [reborn from above—spiritually transformed, renewed, ready to be used] for good works, which God prepared [for us] beforehand [taking paths which He set], so that we would walk in them [living the good life which He prearranged and made ready for us]. How do we move “beyond purpose?” Into our minds and hearts, He calls ideas and ideals, visions and dreams, hopes and resolutions. We literally become the manifestation of God’s creative thought and energy. God has done everything to ensure our complete and total success in His Kingdom purpose for us. However, fear keeps us from doing His will and thus becoming all He created us to be–fear of failure, fear that we are not good enough, capable, equipped, or prepared.
The word
Genesis 8:22: “While the earth remains, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.” There is a time for visible fruitfulness in our lives which also indicates that there are seasons with no visible fruitfulness. Failure to understand God’s working in seasons can cause us to assume that our moments of euphoria are what the Christian life is meant to be. Jesus was not afraid to embrace the changing spiritual seasons of His life. He flowed with God’s moving, responsive in each season. The seasons are designed by God to teach you about you. Winter brings much needed rest and restaging to the vine, and without it the vine could not recycle to harvest. 2 Corinthians 10:12: “We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.” We do ourselves and God no service when we are always frustrated by what God is not doing in our lives, instead of participating in what He is doing. Winter is where the growth cycle begins. When circumstance turns against us, when nothing seems to be happening, we wonder if we will be fruitful again. Most of us prefer to hide the fading. Don’t let anyone see it and they won’t know harvest is over. If you look for visible fruit in the middle of winter you will by that definition be a failure. Winter is a glorious time when God reshapes us from the effects of ministry past to release us to more fruitful days ahead.
There is in every life a certain mystique, a uniqueness, which ultimately becomes our story. Amazingly God is ever moving in mysterious ways to bring us into His-Story. Our human story reveals who we are. We become human as we live our story. You create your story through your choices. You then act out your story in your everyday life. The great news is that any time you don’t like your story; you can change the script and create a new role with a new plot and plan. After air, food, and water, the thing we most need is that our lives mean something. We have a passionate desire for meaning, significance. Your story is measured by the thoughts and purposes that fill your mind and engage your heart. Our human story can often contain a chapter or two of great adversity, pain, disappointment, grief, and loss. While these seasons are not pleasant, they nevertheless have the power to transform our lives and character. Hebrews 12:6-7 (MSG) - My dear child, don’t shrug off God’s discipline, but don’t be crushed by it either. It’s the child He loves that He disciplines; the child He embraces, He also corrects. God is educating you, training you. God has written a story, a script upon our heart – His purpose for our life. He disciplines us, educates us, and trains us as we interact with everyday life. His desire is to help you become you – the “you” He created you to be. God wants to bring you (your story) into His-Story!
All of us are born with a calling on our lives that is meant to be carried out through the expressions of our gifts, talents, and abilities. Our spirit is duty-bound to be loyal to its own desires. Life can only be lived to the fullest measure when we abandon ourselves to the master-passion God has put within us. Within each of us there is a God Positioning System designed to bring us into our calling. Once you identify and discover your calling, you can then organize all of your activities around it. Everything you do should be an expression of your calling. Without a calling to guide you, your goals and action plans may not ultimately fulfill you. You don’t want to get to the top of the ladder only to find out you were leaning up against the wrong wall. Identifying, acknowledging, and living your calling is the most important action you can take. Your calling must be discovered, embraced, and, lived with passion and enthusiasm. Those who fail to do this get sidetracked on life’s journey. It’s easy to wander and drift, accomplishing little. When you are truly serving your calling, the people, resources, and opportunities you need will supernaturally gravitate toward you. The world benefits too, because when you are in alignment with your calling, all of your actions automatically serve others. That was God’s specific purpose in calling the Jewish people to serve and honor Him. Through them, the actions of the world would be saved, and they would be the envy of the world as God would shower His spiritual and material blessings upon them. Romans 11:28 tells us they hardened their hearts to His calling on their lives. But God used that to the advantage and benefit of the Gentiles. Romans 11:29 is a great promise and a stark reminder of just how great a responsibility we each have as to the perfecting of our gifts and callings. Simply put, they are without repentance. That means they are irrevocable. God does not change His mind about your calling and gifting. He never withdraws them once they are given, and He does not change His mind about those to whom He gives His grace or to whom He sends His call. Romans 11:33 reminds us of the depths of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God. How unsearchable are His judgments and His ways past finding out. He (Paul) is talking about God’s wisdom and knowledge of your calling and gifting. God is the originator of all things – all things come from Him. He, God, originated your calling and gifting. He chose them for you. God is the sustainer of all things – they all depend on Him. He, God, sustains your calling and gifting. No one can change your calling or gifting or stop them.
Romans 15:4, 13 (AMPC): 4For whatever was thus written in former days was written for our instruction, that by [our steadfast and patient] endurance and the encouragement [drawn] from the Scriptures we might hold fast to and cherish hope. 13May the God of your hope so fill you with all joy and peace in believing [through the experience of your faith] that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound and be overflowing (bubbling over) with hope. As an acrostic, the word “HOPE” can mean ~ Heavenly Optimism Personally Experienced Hope is a virtue which the soul needs for energy and motivation. Hope is always necessary for the restoration of a wounded spirit. We need hope to press on, to endure, to stay focused, and to see dreams fulfilled. Hope has been called the energy and effort of faith. It is the power to be cheerful in circumstances that we know to be desperate. 1 Peter 1:3 says Jesus “caused us to be born again to a ‘Living Hope.’” Hope fuels life with joy, peace, and love. Two words will help you cope when you run low on hope ~ Accept and Trust. Accept the mystery of hardship, suffering, misfortune, or mistreatment. Don’t try to understand it or to explain it. Accept it. Move on. Then trust God to protect you by His power from this very moment to the dawning of eternity. God has an agenda for each of us. Jeremiah 29:11 ~ For I know the plans (agenda) I have for you, declares the Lord…to give you a future and a hope. God’s agenda for His people is that they never lose hope.
culture
Deuteronomy 6:6-9 (AMPC) And you shall love the Lord your God with all your [mind and] heart and with your entire being and with all your might. And these words which I am commanding you this day shall be [first] in your [own] minds and hearts; [then] You shall whet and sharpen them so as to make them penetrate, and teach and impress them diligently upon the [minds and] hearts of your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down and when you rise up. And you shall bind them as a sign upon your hand, and they shall be as frontlets (forehead bands) between your eyes. And you shall write them upon the doorposts of your house and on your gates. The words “son” and “daughter” are from an original root meaning “to build.” The Bible instructs us that children are to be regarded as divine gifts, pledges of God’s favor, and as His heritage. The Bible is literally a book about children. It teaches that all children are received in trust as belonging, first of all, to God. As His property, but loaned to parents to love and care for, they should be taught that they belong to God as well as to their parents. It is never too early nor too late to teach children the truths of God’s Word. The first and primary responsibility of parents is to bring their children to Jesus for His blessing and salvation. Jesus was ever touching and blessing children in the New Testament. He warned that no one should offend them. “Offend'' means “cause to stumble.” It is a betrayal of trust. In Deuteronomy 6, the word “diligently” is used concerning how children are to be taught. The word means, “to sharpen” and is associated with sharpening weapons, as arrows and spears, to make them penetrate deep into the flesh of victims. God’s Word must be driven deep into the soul and spirit of a child by love and modeling of holy living. The words sitting, walking, lying down and rising up refer to the whole life with all its activities. Parents are supposed to be the first interpreters of God’s Word to their children. Every child comes into the world full of promise and parents are charged with a Godly responsibility to raise that child in the ways of the Lord. There are two sides to the coin of parental responsibility, namely, to be full of faith and then to be faithful. Being full of faith implies implicit trust in the living God, in His covenant for parents and children alike, in His promises for a home ordered after His will, and in His faithfulness to undertake according to His Word. 2. Being faithful is the other side of the coin. If we are full of faith, then, we shall be faithful, taking the Bible as the measure of life for the whole family. I pray that you take this responsibility of holy living as your greatest responsibility because your children depend on it!
The True Church Ephesians 5:25-27 In the history of mankind absolutely nothing has ever been created that comes close to the glorious organism called the church. Throughout the ages people have cursed it, hated it, maligned it, scorned it, blamed it, criticized it, rejected it, loved it, died for it, sacrificed for it, praised it, embraced it, and surrendered their all to it. God loved it enough to send His son to die for it. Christ loved it so much that He willingly gave Himself up for it, and guaranteed He would build it and perfect it. The Bible clearly tells us that the church is forever secured and protected by the blood, life and word of Jesus Christ. Dictators have pledged its extinction. Rulers have outlawed its right to exist. Evildoers have killed to stamp out its message. But through it all the church marches on, stronger than ever, it’s message heralded far and wide, its influence ever increasing. This organism called the church is founded upon Jesus Christ; He alone is its head and the source of its power. Our witnessing does not build His church. He builds His church upon the witness in the world of how we, His saints, live our lives. The words we speak, the deeds we do, the attitudes we exhibit, the way we treat each other become the materials He uses to build His church or that Satan uses to hinder or attack the church. Every day we either build His church by living faithful, trusting and holy lives so the world around us sees Christ in us, or we live doubting, negative and complaining lives so the world around us sees Satan working through us. People will either be drawn to Christ or repelled by the way we live our lives on a daily basis. Love is the greatest conquering force in the world. Paul said Christ loved the church so much “He gave Himself up for it,” that He might “sanctify it.” Ephesians 5:25-27 And to the husbands, you are to demonstrate love for your wives with the same tender devotion that Christ demonstrated to us, his bride. For he died for us, sacrificing himself to make us holy and pure, cleansing us through the showering of the pure water of the Word of God. All that he does in us is designed to make us a mature church for his pleasure, until we become a source of praise to him—glorious and radiant, beautiful and holy, without fault or flaw. Husbands have the obligation of loving and caring for their wives the same way they love and care for their own bodies, for to love your wife is to love your own self. No one abuses his own body, but pampers it—serving and satisfying its needs. That’s exactly what Christ does for his church! He serves and satisfies us as members of his body. For this reason a man is to leave his father and his mother and lovingly hold to his wife, since the two have become joined as one flesh. Marriage is the beautiful design of the Almighty, a great mystery of Christ and his church. So every married man should be gracious to his wife just as he is gracious to himself. And every wife should be tenderly devoted to her husband. Do you love the church as Christ loves it? The true church then will exhibit four powerful characteristics: 1. Reality Reality in faith and in practice. Members will really believe what they profess and live as He commands us to live, true, real and whole. 2. Unity This only happens when we focus on Him rather than on each other. God’s created world has diversity everywhere – animals, plants and humans. There must be unity in diversity. 3. Courage Our armor is designed to protect our front side – helmet, breastplate, feet, shield of faith and sword (Ephesians 6). Courageously we are to stand up and fight the enemies of Christ and His church, defending and contending for the faith which has been delivered to us. 4. Spiritual Through intimate communion with God with God we experience a vivid sense of the supernatural, a lively consciousness of God and His works. Our spiritual eyes will be opened, spiritual ears unstopped and our spiritual forces energized to pursue spiritual truth. The thing that matters most is not how many people we get into the church, but how many go out from the church and carry with them a character that transforms the world. Change a person’s thought life and you give that person a new life.
marriage
It is the business of the church and of all Christians to uphold by Word and life the God-ideal of marriage – one man for one woman. The very purpose of making a male and a female was so they could become one. The unique plumbing of each – different in body and in soul but the same in spirit – gives opportunity for intimacy and procreation. Biologically and psychologically men and women are different, but spiritually they are identical. Becoming one with God, jumpstarts the oneness that forms when the marriage grows in Him. It’s important to remember that God created marriage to be based on a covenant, not simply a contract. God’s creation of a marriage covenant embraces the following principles: A marriage covenant is based on trust in God. A marriage contract is based on the distrust of each other. A marriage covenant embraces unlimited responsibility. A marriage contract accepts limited responsibility. A marriage covenant cannot be disannulled by man. A marriage contract can be voided by mutual consent. The path to oneness takes time. It’s a journey, a worthwhile voyage as you discover the best connection you could have with your spouse—oneness. Marriage must be intentional and based on the truth that if we want something to happen, we need to make it happen. Either you will “happen” to your marriage, or circumstances will “happen” to it. Make an investment in your marriage. You become intimate with the one to whom you pray, the one for whom you pray and the one with whom you pray. Become one; you won’t regret it.
What does a marriage made in Heaven and lived out on Earth look like? A wife is to fit her life into her husband’s life like a hand fitting inside a glove—become one with Him. All of that is after the Bible says, “Husbands love your wives.” It’s the very first principle—a husband in marriage is to love his wife and become one with her. And when that happens, you experience that oneness of marriage and the mystery begins to unfold. As you live your marriage in oneness, it becomes a beautiful mystery. First of all, marriage is a spiritual thing. The person who created marriage was spiritual. Marriage has a spiritual foundation. It can only be fulfilling when it comes from a spiritual standpoint. Thus, spirit-soul-body not, body-soul-spirit. You need a spiritual relationship first, then you develop the soulical connection after, then the body connection follows. God said in Genesis—”the two shall become one flesh.” They were naked and not ashamed. The word “flesh” there does not refer to the “body” only, it refers to the whole person—spirit, soul, and body. They were naked in their soul; they were open with each other in their marriage. There was nothing they didn’t know about the other. The more you know each other before you get married, the better chance you have of developing a great marriage of oneness. And the mystery that Paul speaks of...the mystery of Christ and His church...you will never understand as a human the love that Christ had for the church. He was willing to suffer, bleed, die. But, Paul said, if a husband loves his wife like that and he’s actually willing to put to death and sacrifice for her, then she will be the best she can be (which is what Jesus did for the church—-He died to equip the church, He died to empower the church). So as a husband, you have to be willing to sacrifice yourself to empower your wife. And while you’re doing this, you are loving her, and she’s responding to that love because she is getting something that she can’t get from any place else. She is being fulfilled and that love then returns back to her husband, and he too feels fulfilled. My request to you: Get up every day and choose to be in love with the person you are married to. Do something that shows love to your spouse. Marriage isn’t something you do once a month—it’s every day. Love your spouse intentionally, and you will see the difference in the quality of your marriage and the oneness that is being developed. I promise--you WILL love the result! Ephesians 5:25-33 (AMP Husbands, love your wives [seek the highest good for her and surround her with a caring, unselfish love], just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify the church, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word [of God], so that [in turn] He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy [set apart for God] and blameless. Even so husbands should and are morally obligated to love their own wives as [being in a sense] their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own body, but [instead] he nourishes and protects and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members (parts) of His body. For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined [and be faithfully devoted] to his wife, and the two shall become]one flesh. This mystery [of two becoming one] is great; but I am speaking with reference to [the relationship of] Christ and the church. However, each man among you [without exception] is to love his wife as his very own self [with behavior worthy of respect and esteem, always seeking the best for her with an attitude of lovingkindness], and the wife [must see to it] that she respects and delights in her husband [that she notices him and prefers him and treats him with loving concern, treasuring him, honoring him, and holding him dear].
In a marriage relationship, you must teach your spouse how to respond to you, how to treat you. Communication and understanding are absolute necessities for growth in the marriage. Each must commit to creating an atmosphere of openness and acceptance. Conflict is inevitable and no marriage is immune. If and when it is handled scripturally, conflict can produce change and an opportunity for spiritual and relational growth. God created marriage and His Word reveals how best to conduct it and ways to resolve marital challenges. When the first married couple sinned, God confronted them. The man blamed the woman and the woman blamed the serpent. Both had been wrong, but neither was willing to admit their wrong. Proverbs 28:13 (AMP): He who covers his transgressions will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes his sins will obtain mercy. What many couples lack is the skill to discuss disagreements and resolve them. The goal should always be to reconcile, not to hurt one another. Instead of attacking one another, we should work together to attack the problem. Often our greatest challenge in conflict within marriage is how differently men and women perceive reality. Someone has suggested that there are 3 states of mind in a marriage relationship: Intimacy (two givers) Conflict (one or two takers) Withdrawal (two leavers) Marriage deserves four things: two givers and two forgivers. Love is not love because it suffers long; it is love because, in its suffering, it is kind. God designed the human soul and also designed marriage as the ultimate human fulfillment of our souls in this life. Marriage is life on the fly with adjustments and transitions that bring about a process of order. God never wants marriage partners to compete with each other but to complete one another.
In my new book, One Plus One Equals One , I speak about a concept called “soul-nakedness.” It’s a common challenge in many marriages today. My hope is to get many marriages to understand this concept to better improve their marriages. Let’s start at the beginning. The first two people to have a marriage union— Adam and Eve. As we know, they were naked in the Garden. Their nakedness means no cover-up, total vulnerability, total trust, and total acceptance. The ability to “bare your soul” is often missing between married partners. Often it is the fear of being rejected, or of being made fun of that keeps us from “bearing our soul.” In Jeremiah 24:7, God said, “I will give them a heart to know Me...” Deep intimacy in a relationship is the heart cry of every life. We are created for oneness− first with God and then with a mate. What every woman needs, desires, and wants is a God−like man. Jesus reveals what true manhood is all about. He demonstrated a perfectly balanced life. He was secure in His identity. He knew who He was, what He was, and what His purpose was. He was truth personified. There was no pretense, no cover-up, no façade. God has always intended that you and I live from the inside to the outside, from the spirit-man in communion with the eternal Spirit of God rather than from the outside to the inside – the soul and body in communion with your environment. Romans 8:6 (AMPC) Now the mind of the flesh (which is sense and reason without the Holy Spirit) is death. But the mind of the (Holy) Spirit is life and (soul) peace (both now and forever). Spiritual vision comes from divine revelation. Inward communion with God brings about outward behavior, which results in life and peace. This peace is not just the absence of conflict but a peace which is the possession of adequate resources, making us secure. When the heart has this kind of peace, life is abundant, energetic, courageous, and resourceful. When you are secure with each other, then the ability to bear your soul to your spouse becomes effortless. The more you bear your soul and experience “soul-nakness,” the more oneness develops. Be one. Experience oneness in your marriage.
Not only did God uniquely design the man and the woman, scientific studies have revealed why they function differently. Each has a left brain/ right brain and each functions differently. The verbal, sorting, detail-oriented side of the brain is the left. The spatial, intuitive, non-verbal side of the brain is the right. Women hang out more in their left brains, whereas men hang out more in their right brains. A woman speaks about 7,000 words per day while a man speaks about 2,000. A man’s brain is about 10% larger than that of a woman. This says more about physical size than intelligence. Women have four times as many brain cells (neurons) connecting the right and left sides of their brains. Since women’s voices have many more frequencies than men’s, his brain must work harder to analyze sound frequencies and comprehend the meaning intended. A man senses a situation and takes action intuitively (though his responses may be very restricted). He reacts knowing it is the right thing to do. A woman may have long debates in her head before making a decision or taking action. Men and women should become aware of their unique identities, accept their differences, and live their lives fully and as skillfully as possible. It’s a beautiful thing to be different; it means God created each gender—male and female—to complement one another. Unity in diversity is God’s design and is absolutely essential in a healthy marriage relationship. The word “man” in Hebrew comes from a root word meaning “exercising power.” The word “woman” in Hebrew comes from a root word meaning “to be soft.” God planned and designed the human heart for love, marriage, companionship, home, and children. He created the woman to fulfill man’s potential. Woman is glorified in the fact that no man is complete without a woman. Without a woman, a man cannot be in love. Without a wife, a man cannot be a husband. Without a queen, a man cannot be a king. Marriage is an adventure to journey together. You have been given different roles, different traits, different tasks, different makeups to make your marriage better. Don’t use those differences to detract from your marriage, use them to enhance your marriage! Genesis 2:7, 21-22 (AMP) ⁷ Then the Lord God formed man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath or spirit of life, and man became a living being. ²¹ And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam; and while he slept, He took one of his ribs or a part of his side and closed up the [place with] flesh. ²² And the rib or part of his side which the Lord God had taken from the man He built up and made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.
Marriage is an investment by a man and a woman into an intimate relationship that continually grows in value. Every marriage consists of two givers and two forgivers. I read of one bride who was concerned about the controlling tendencies of her fiancé. She sent him a card which read- If you are planning to control someone, sleep with your remote. Marriage is not finding that one special person you can live with, but that one you cannot live without. Man was created to long deeply for fulfillment and satisfaction which could only come from “the breath of life.” Woman was made from the man so he would always be connected to her. She would fulfill and complete him. In Ephesians 5:31- 32, the Bible speaks of the mystery of the union of husband and wife. “For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined [and be faithfully devoted] to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery [of two becoming one] is great; but I am speaking with reference to [the relationship of] Christ and the church.” In II Corinthians 4:7, the Bible speaks of the precious treasure that is within each of us− literally what God revealed to us through His Word which causes us to constantly be triumphant in our daily living. “But we have this precious treasure [the good news about salvation] in [unworthy] earthen vessels [of human frailty], so that the grandeur and surpassing greatness of the power will be [shown to be] from God [His sufficiency] and not from ourselves.” Every marriage is a mystery and every marriage has within it a hidden, buried treasure. That mystery is concerning all that the marriage can become as each spouse lives in covenant with God and their marriage partner. Living in covenant with God and each other unveils, reveals, and releases the treasures built into us by God for creating a valuable marriage relationship. In that mystical union of a man and woman in the sanctity of marriage, a treasure is discovered within each of them that brings fulfillment, completion, and understanding.
Individually it takes a long time to become. Likewise, marriage takes a long time to become. Every marriage is enhanced when the husband and wife spend time together discussing how they want it to look and where they want it to go. A great marriage is created on purpose by two people committed to filling their life together with loving behaviors that lend to deep and lasting feelings of love. On their wedding day, a man and woman stand up publicly and profess a life-long commitment to one another. Often they possess no clue as to how that commitment is to be lived out on a day-to-day basis. Most ordinary marriages operate on unspoken assumptions about how married life should be. Creating a shared vision of marriage isn’t like trying to learn to ride a bike which you do once. It’s more like pedaling the bike. The vision changes as the couple grows older, but it remains a mutually determined map for a committed, intimate, passionate, and spiritual life together. A marriage is like a garden – give it time and attention and the seeds will grow strong and produce much fruit. Every married couple should have at least a one-hour session each week devoted to the marriage. In your first meeting, brainstorm about all the areas you want to vision together. A great vision is powerless to help you create the marriage you both want if it isn’t translated into action. We must live as if relationships with God and loved ones are the most important things in life and consistently pursue excellence in them. An important part of keeping a marriage full of life is learning how to honor your dreams, my dreams and our dreams. Healthy people, married or not, pursue dreams that give their individual journeys to God depth and purpose.
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